Am I Having An Orgasm

Alex Robboy, CAS, MSW, LCSW
Individual, Couples & Family Therapy
IMAGO Certified Marriage Counselor
AASECT Certified Sex Therapist Supervisor
Founder & Director of the Center for Growth Inc.

Posted by: Alex Robboy
CAS, MSW, LCSW Individual, Couples & Family Therapy IMAGO Certified Marriage Counselor AASECT Certified Sex Therapist Supervisor Founder & Director of the Center for Growth Inc.
267-324-9564

Ask Alex, I need your help. Currently, I am having good sex. I know this because it feels good. My question is, how will I know if I am having an orgasm? During orgasm, will the ‘cum’ flow out? Amy

Dear Amy, I am glad to hear that you are having ‘good’ sex and that it is pleasurable for you. Having good sex is important! Many people cannot say that. It goes without saying that the point of sex, contrary to popular belief is not having an ‘orgasm,’ but rather the process of being sexually aroused / intimate with yourself and/or others. Remember the days when you first kissed a boy or a girl and you were TOTALLY satisfied? During that first kiss, or first ‘heavy petting’ experience, the world felt like it was going to stop. There was no orgasm, yet you were completely satisfied. Ok, so if you want to be ‘goal’ oriented, how will you know if you have ‘achieved’ an orgasm? During an orgasm you will experience a series of PC (puboccygeal) muscle contractions. To locate the PC muscle, try stopping your urine, mid-flow. The muscle that you use to stop yourself from urinating mid-flow is called the PC muscle. Some women report that these contractions feel like you are sneezing, except that this sensation stems from your genital area and not your nose. The contractions will feel out of your control. In the moment, like a sneeze, you will be unable to stop the contraction. In regard to your second question, will the ‘cum flow out,’ the answer is yes and no. A small percentage of the population during orgasm will experience, what is called, Female Ejaculation. During female ejaculation fluid is expelled from the urethra. This fluid is not to be mistaken for urine, because it is made from a different substance. However, the majority of women will not experience this. They may merely experience an increase in vaginal lubrication.